Love Lacks Logic
by frozen-eclipse
Summary: Takes place after the good ending of Disgaea 2. Rozalin thinks about what love is and what Adell means to her.


Disgaea 2: Love Lacks Logic

A/N: This has been on my hard drive many months. And thanks to awesome people, helping me with titles on my birthday, I can finally publish this. Adell x Rozalin is one of my favorite pairings, and since the good ending left so much to interpret, it's really no surprise that I wrote this. On another note, I apologize for any and all OOCness. I worked very hard on this, so I hope you enjoy it!

I hadn't talked to Adell much recently, or anyone for that matter. Honestly, neither of us felt particularly talkative, but we each had our own reasons for that. The air of awkwardness was not the only issue this time, as I found myself avoiding him. I would sleep at odd hours, leave the house when he was sleeping, basically trying to have a schedule opposite of him so I wouldn't have to talk to him, or anyone. My thoughts were still not sorted out.

What is love? It wasn't a subject that my textbooks had ever gone into great detail about. The man I had called my father, the man that I had held affection for was now dead, along with my trust in people and my definition of love. _Stop talking. And trust this. _That was the last thing Adell had said to me. Then he kissed me. Was it love, or was I reading too deeply into it? Was it just an act of desperation to calm me down?

_I am Rozalin, the only daughter of Overlord Zenon. _Well, that was one of the big things I had also learned I was wrong about. Though I couldn't remember much of what happened the first time the force inside of me had taken over, I could remember this time. I unfortunately could now remember my past life, but I wasn't going to dwell on it right now.

But each time I had lost control, Adell had been there to snap me out of it. Adell, has always been there for me. Was it just because of his vow to protect me? Or was it something more?

Was I just grasping for love and affection? No, Adell's family had already warmly accepted me. I had a family now, they may not send me flowers everyday, but at least there's less room for doubt this time.

What was I looking for then? Better question, what was I running from? Hanako had prodded me for a while after the incident, but she soon seemed to have figured out talking to brick walls would be less futile and instead mumbled things to herself about Etna and departure.

I longed to talk to Adell. I knew it was inevitable, but I still dreaded it. But, I was sick and tired of sitting against this tree. Sure the weather was nice for so early in the morning, but I can't keep acting like I'm mute. I left my spot and walked towards Holt Village. I instinctively went up against a tree when I saw Adell walking away from his parents. Did they finally tell him what they said they would? I had suspected it had already happened but, there couldn't have been too many things they'd planned to tell him. I wonder what he lear-

"Rozalin, why are you avoiding everyone?" I froze. The voice I longed to hear most, the voice I was least anxious to hear. Had I been so lost in my thoughts that he had plenty of time to walk towards me?

"a-Adell! Wha... what are you doing here!?" was about all I could manage to stammer out. I honestly hope my face isn't red. It must have been obvious I was spying, that and... it was still just so awkward.

"This isn't healthy. Hanako said that she noticed you were going out from night until dawn and then pretending to sleep all day. You barely eat, and you haven't said a word to anyone! Everyone's worried. We know that the battle must have been a shock to you but..."

"What business is it of yours?! It isn't anyone's business but my own! Now, if you'll excuse me..." I snapped at him before quickly walking off. I had managed to find my voice. Yet, what I had said pained me. But what could I have said? There weren't too many safe answers, or at least I hadn't been able to come up with any. Honestly, I half expected him to go after me, but thankfully he didn't. But.. did I wish he had?

I sat on a rock. I still felt guilty for what I said, I also wondered what he was going to say next. _You aren't alone._ He's said it before, was it what he was about to say? I sat there a while pondering.

It must have been some time in the afternoon now and I was sick of this. Running around is foolish. Before I knew it, I was up and looking for Adell. I soon found him laying in the grass, staring into space. Before I could argue with myself, I had taken a seat next to him.

I took a deep breath and swallowed my pride. "...Adell... I'm... really... sorry about earlier. I just wasn't ready to talk."

"It's fine, don't worry about it." He sounded fairly normal, if not a little distant. "Rozalin, can I talk to you?" It's not about.. **that** is it? Hesitantly, I nodded. He sat up and absentmindedly rubbed one of his cheeks with his pointer finger, seemingly trying to mask a slight blush on his face. "Well, if its the.. erm... kiss that's bothering you..." He **was** talking about that! Darn. "you can just pretend it never happened." Does he realize how hard that would be? Just remember manners and composure.

"Let's not talk about that right now. What else is bothering you?" Okay, good job, I did it.

"... how would you feel if you found out that you killed your own parents?" He sounded utterly disgusted with himself. I felt pain stab my heart before the shock settled in.

"What do you mean?"

"The masked servants... it **was** them, I'm positive. Until now, I had just told them I was too tired to listen right now, but today, Mom told me that... not very many demons emigrated to Veldime fifteen years ago and also went to go stop Zenon's curse." The word "demon" really shouldn't have surprised me. There had been those times when I had wondered if he was really human, but I guess hearing him go on and on about the human spirit was what did made me decide against that.

"So you're a demon..."

"Yup, a true demon that murdered his parents." He shook his head. "Let's drop the subject, I'm sure you don't want to hear about this." This may surprise you Adell, but I **do** want to hear it. My next move I'm sure surprised both of us– I suddenly embraced him, an action that still felt foreign to me.

"Adell, don't forget, they wanted to be free of the curse, and they wouldn't want you to be haunted for what you did to save them. Adell, you aren't alone, so stop acting like you are. You have Taro and Hanako, and your parents..." I moved away from him, faced the other way, and began to mumble, getting slightly more audible with each word.. "...and you have me. I'll listen to your problems."

We sat in silence for a bit. He laid back down. "Rozalin, did you want to talk about your problems?"

"There's not much to really say, I just need to adjust to some new facts now. My father wasn't my father and it seems pretty likely that I lived in Yukimaru's village, that's all there really is to it," I sighed. "but," I paused, "thank you for worrying." Though I had received a wonderful education, finding words for things felt so difficult at times.

More silence. After about eleven minutes, I looked back at Adell. He was relaxed and had his eyes closed, breathing calmly to the point where I could suspect he was sleeping. Still sitting, I shut my own and just began to remember back, images of the last battle we had all experienced now playing back in my head.. Adell... in my lack of control I had attacked him. I had expected him to dodge it, I had hoped for him to run, I had silently prayed he would kill me if I attacked anyone, but he did none of those. He had refused to give up on me.

What was I to Adell? He depended on me as an ally, yet I think I was also a friend to him. He treated me differently than he did to the others. But, that isn't much of an answer.

What was Adell to me? He's more than an ally, more than a friend, but not exactly family. I certainly liked him, but do I feel for him? My heart knows the answer, and it urges to tell me, but I silence it once again, for I still fear the answer.

I opened my eyes again, wondering how much time had passed. I opted for a more comfortable position, and put my legs straight out in front of me. Adell was sleeping, just as he had been before but seeming even more relaxed than I had seen him in a while, and I thought back to the "incident" again. I smiled. I may not have every answer, yet in my heart, it feels like it all makes sense.

I looked over at Adell again, and he was the same as before. I took a deep breath, calming myself. I quietly whispered to myself, "It's just a thank you, it's just a thank you" repeating it over and over again like a mantra. I wasn't going to argue with myself this time, for it was now or probably never. I leaned over and gave him a very light, somewhat chaste kiss. It had to have lasted for less than three seconds, but as I was moving away, I felt him move. Panicking, I pulled away quickly and stood up. He sat up hastily, with widened eyes staring straight at me, a blush on his face.

"Roz, Rozalin, you... feel..." it seemed he wasn't going to complete his sentence anytime soon, but we both knew what he had left to say. This was foolish of myself. I looked away, and dusted myself off, trying to hide the heat on my cheeks. I hadn't honestly expected him to be awake. What could I say, what could I do?!

Perhaps I was mocking him. "You can just pretend it never happened." I really couldn't say if I was, unfortunately, thinking things through seemed a bit useless here. Yet, after I said that, I found an understanding in when he had said it. Realizing he was now standing up, I turned back around towards him with a slight grin on my face, the heat on my cheeks hopefully not too visible.

He proved his answer of before by kissing me once again, but it wasn't like before, because unlike a few days ago, I was myself this time. I returned his deed hesitantly, but earnestly. When we broke away, I was at a loss for words yet again. Words may not be the only communication in the universe, but I relied on them the most.

Once again I was falling back on tradition, by turning away and crossing my arms. "Don't you have any manners?! You should know that's not how you treat a princess!" I hadn't intended to say that. I guess old habits die hard like they say.

"Well excuse me! Who was the one who decided she could do as she liked if she thought I was sleeping?!"

"What about a few days ago, when you seemed to think it was okay to force yourself on me!"

"I did what I had to! Besides, did you think that gave you the right to wreck my tie!?"

"I did the world a favor, you have such a terrible fashion sense! Did you think the stupid tie was **cool** or something?" We stomped off in opposite directions. I giggled, everything was back to normal again, yet I knew something had changed.

Later I was back at the house, acting like nothing had happened. I think I now understand what love is, and why it wasn't in my textbooks. It isn't something easy to define. I looked it up in a dictionary, though there were many definitions, none of them got it perfectly. Is it even possible to define it perfectly? Love is something logic is helpless against, it's a feeling, a complicated feeling, but a feeling all the same.


End file.
